Waves and Trials

As the second phase of UPT started, I knew that more of my time would be spent studying and preparing for flights and that life would get more challenging.  And such has been the case.  Glory to God for challenging phases of life!

This past Thursday I hooked (failed) a flight.  I took it as a really hard blow because my previous flight with the same IP (Instructor Pilot) had gone quite well.  My mind never seemed to catch up to the aircraft during the entire flight, and my performance on most of the maneuvers was less that impressive.  On top of that, the failure meant that I was put on hold for the rest of training until I could fly again with that IP, which wouldn't be until the following Tuesday because of the flying schedule.  That meant I would have a few more written tests hanging over my head waiting for me if I passed the flight the next Tuesday.  Needless to say, I was quite down-hearted, especially because three hooked flight in a row means I am sent to an evaluation flight (which could eliminate me from Pilot Training altogether).

My first reaction was a feeling of hopelessness.  I didn't feel like there was anything I could do about fixing the things that went wrong - I was just wasn't on my "A-game".  When I came home, I shared the events of the day  with Kamaya, who was very encouraging and reminded me of the Lord's Faithfulness.  With her encouragement, I went into the prayer room and spent some time before the Lord in prayer.  During my conversation with the Lord, I felt Him telling me, "This is the smallest of waves, and you run to me like the Apostles did on the boat, in despair asking if I care if they parish?  Of course I care for you!  And Love you.  Know that these waves that you are feeling are yet small in comparison  to the waves that are to come.  Have Faith in me.   Know that I will not let you sink.  I Love you."  These words had a comforting, yet uneasing affect on me.  I stopped worrying as much about my hooked ride, but was a little concerned about bigger waves.

The weekend passed, and much studying was done.  Monday came and went, throughout which even more studying was done.  I thought for sure I'd be able to rock this next flight and steer clear of a potential pilot training elimination ride.  I began to rely a little too much on myself...and unfortunately the ride did not go as I expected.  In fact, it went worse than the first.  My initial reaction: I felt a slight anger with God and began to wonder if the time I spent in prayer that morning and the night before could have been better used studying for the flight.  To exacerbate my already upset mood, I was prevented from getting lunch because of the inspection that was going on.  My friends reassured me that everything would be alright, though, and I just pressed on with studying for the next exam that was coming up, as well as studying for the next day's flight (which, if hooked, would result in me doing an elimination ride).  It was difficult to concentrate, though, with the previous ride's events looming over my head, threatening to repeat themselves one more time to end my short-lived career as a pilot.

When I got home I studied some more - Kamaya was at a nurses' meeting at the hospital.  When she came home, however, she reminded me of what the Lord had told me the previous week.  She reminded me that the Lord would be faithful to us no matter what, and that He only allows things to happen in our lives if they are for our good.  She reminded me that the enemy is constantly wanting to separate us from God in whatever way he can - whether it's causing us to give up on the path the Lord has laid before us, or whether it's causing us to lean upon our own intelligence and skills, throwing aside God's role in our lives.  That's when I realized how I had fallen for the enemy's trap earlier that day when I had questioned the value of spending time with God.  I ask the Lord's forgiveness, put aside my study materials for the night (it was already quite late), said prayers with Kamaya, and went to bed, resting in the Lord's grace, peace, and hope.  Glory to God for His goodness.

-Maic

Engagement Season Resources

Our Experiences with Engagement Programs in the Catholic Church

During our engagements season, we were required by the Catholic Church to participate in/complete several different programs.  Each program helped us grow in our Faith and in our relationship with one another in different ways.  We are posting our experiences here for those who would like to know what to expect from each program.

Marriage Prep Course

The marriage prep course we took was recommended to us by our really good friend and mentor from the Academy.  It was an online course run by Chritian and Christine Meert in Colorado Springs.  The course really helped us explore the roots of marriage and helped us build a solid foundation of the theology behind marriage.  After setting that foundation, the course explored the practical aspects of marriage in light of the Church’s teaching.  It covered topics ranging from the institution of marriage as a Sacrament to the sacredness of sex in marriage; from why artificial contraception is against the Church’s teaching to proper financial management tips.  During each of the nine courses, we were given an assigned reading, after which we were required to answer anywhere from 15-40 questions.  Each question stimulated discussions that helped continue to build the foundation on which our relationship is founded.  We were also assigned a “tutor couple” who went over our responses to the discussion questions online.  They were very quick to give us feedback on our responses, providing us with a new perspective from which to see many of the Church’s teachings.  We HIGHLY recommend this course for anyone preparing for the Sacrament of Matrimony, especially those who are not in the same state for most of their engagement.

The FOCCUS Questionnaire

The FOCCUS engagement questionnaire was a multiple choice worksheet administered to each of us by our deacon at Our Lady of Mount Carmel.  It’s a tool that the Church uses to ensure that couples getting married have already talked about all the potential obstacles they may have to overcome during their marriage.  It has over 200 statements such as “I am concerned about my partner’s spending habits,” to which a response of “I agree”, “I don’t know”, or “I disagree” is selected.  The questionnaire provided us with quite a few hearty laughs, as confusion in the answer sheet led Kamaya to believe that I was concerned about her “drinking problem,” among other things.  Her face was priceless as she sat puzzled at the other end of the table, racking her brain as to the last time she had drunk more than a single drink. All confusion and hearty laughs aside, it offered us the opportunity to look at our relationship from our partner’s point of view.

Engaged Encounter

Engaged Encounter is a weekend retreat that is offered by parishes all across the United States.  Two couples lead the retreat – they read from a personalized pre-prepared script about their experiences with the topic being covered.  After finishing the reading/talk, each couple is given time to write their own thoughts individually (men and women are separated for this part).  After about 15 minutes, the couple meets up in a dorm room and discusses what they have written.  We found the format of the talks to be a little impersonal at first, but realized that it helps provide uniformity and makes leading the retreat more accessible to the average, experienced Catholic couple living according to the teachings of the Church.  The couples that were on the retreat with us came from all walks of life, and it was awesome being able to hang out with them and share stories.  An advantage to the retreat is that it is not dependent upon the other couples taking the retreat with you.  Each couple gets out of the retreat exactly how much they put into it.  We found that even though some of the discussion questions might not apply, other questions could be taken to a deeper, more intimate level that could spur very fruitful discussions as a couple.

NFP Training

Complete training in the Art of Natural Family planning is given through four, two hour classes over the course of four months.  The four month time span allows the couples to start/get practice charting so that they are ready to live NFP by the time the wedding comes around.  Unfortunately, Maic was only able to attend one of the courses because of our distance during the engagement season.  This being said, however, he diligently went over the readings and helped look at the charts and analyze them as we were going through the training.  This helped us maintain the mindset that living NFP is BOTH of our responsibility, not just one person’s.